In the early to mid 1980s the world was suffering a hangover, after a brutal combination of 70s disco glam rock. But one thing was for sure, Michael Jackson was every girl’s “Thriller.” Even for me at the not-so-ripe age of six, living in my teenage sister’s shadow, there was nothing better than that guy who could spin like a top and stand on his toes.

After eating family dinner in our yellow-flowered kitchen, my sister Rachel and I would run upstairs and get ready to put on a show. First, she’d style me with massive bangs that waved to one side and an oversized white t-shirt that was perfect to slip off one shoulder and belt into a dress. Then came the makeup – bubblegum pink blush, bright blue eye shadow to compliment the bright blue mascara, and the reddest lipstick she could get her hands on. Rachel then glammed herself up and suddenly we were transformed into “punk rockers.” With either Thriller or Off The Wall in hand (on vinyl, of course), we’d run downstairs straight to our dad’s record player and strategically place the needle to one of our favorites: “Wanna Be Startin’ Something,” “Billie Jean,” “I Wanna Rock With You,” or “Don’t Stop Till You Get Enough.”

In an instance, Rachel and I were on stage showing off the latest moves we learned in dance class and our best Michael impressions. We moonwalked, we twirled, and we wore one glove. We’d get so utterly high off of Michael’s voice pumping through us that nothing else existed. And it was contagious. It never took long to get the entire family boogying around the house singing, “Mamma say mamma saw mamaco saw.”

That’s the thing about Michael; his melodies are adrenalin shots that can lift all walks of life. He wrote timeless grooves and soulful lyrics that continue to be universally appreciated. Regardless of what he did or didn’t do, Michael Jackson was a musical juggernaut.

by Genette Nowak

NOT ROCK

Photo courtesy of www.brettmichaels.com

Not Rock, bad rock, how about you can’t rock. There is no way I can pass up this opportunity to make fun of the weave-wearing, past his prime, self-proclaimed “rocker” Bret Michaels. Broadway took him down. Actually, they almost beheaded him!

For the opening number of the 2009 Tony Awards at Radio City Music Hall, Poison took the stage – that already sounds silly – to perform with the cast of Rock of Ages. They sang the 1988 classic, “Nothin’ But A Good Time” while chicks in corsets and stripper heels twirled. As their bit was coming to an end Michaels sang, “It don’t get better than this,” and a massive marquee that read Broadway came crashing down on his head – his feet flew up from underneath him, knocking him flat on his ass and his cowboy hat to the floor. Not that I find pleasure in other people’s pain and embarrassment, but it was just too funny!  Even funnier – the moment Michaels was guillotined, a sophisticated Stockard Channing for Pal Joey came out singing, “Oh, wow. Again.” It couldn’t have been planned.

Not sure if it was bad karma or a sign that it’s time for Michaels to retire – after three seasons of a grade D reality TV dating show which brought extreme attention to the fact that it is no longer 1988 and hair bands are not chicly retro. What’s up with the Tony’s thinking it’s okay to sandwich Poison between Elton John and Liza Minnelli? Cheesy, bad rock does not mix with classic, elegant show tunes.

by Genette Nowak

This video is sort of cruel, but just in case you missed it:

NOT ROCK
This week, I want to take a moment to rant about what doesn’t rock. In fact, it sucks. The Gathering of the Vibes has always featured super talent, all in the same spirit of a genuine love for music. In the past, I’ve given many kudos to the Vibes for its line up. But this year I’ve got a huge bone to pick – not about who is on deck, but who’s not. Why isn’t the Dead headlining? It just doesn’t make any sense.

When Jerry Garcia died, a huge loss was felt nationally; thousands upon thousands mourned. For over 30 years, fans followed the Dead not just because they couldn’t get enough of the climactic jams or intense heartfelt lyrics, but because a Dead show was a community of friends. In 1996, a year after Garcia’s death and their last show, the good people at Terrapin Tapes, a media distribution company for concert tapers, decided to throw a memorial party at SUNY Purchase. Their goal was to perpetuate kinship and fill a void. As such, they named it the Deadhead Heaven: A Gathering of the Tribe. In ‘97 the festival relocated and became known as The Gathering of the Vibes.
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ORIGINALITY CORNER

Photo by Mike Persico

I was talking with a guy named after a sausage and often referred to as “Captain Schnitz,” in my kitchen the other night. In some strange and backwards manner that I can’t quite recount, the conversation turned to Man Man. “Who?” I asked.

Though perhaps a bit late to the game, I found out shortly thereafter - totally esoteric, totally hilarious, and totally talented artists. I decided that if Frank Zappa and Phish had a lovechild it would be Man Man. Based out of Philly, members Honus Honus, Pow Pow, Critter Cat, and Chang Wang, Organ “Turkey Moth” Freeman, and Jefferson perpetuate the beauty of dissonance.
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NOT ROCK
In a well-hidden, acoustically suited room on the Lower East Side, the sweet and dissonant sounds of Jim Campilongo fill the ears of attentive listeners. He’s a marble among the chards of glass.

Campilongo’s longtime Monday night residency at The Living Room showcases his versatility. Sometimes he goes solo, shredding a combination of classical and jazz guitar, speaking the language of sweet beauty. But when accompanied by his electric trio, Campilongo comes hard. Last Monday, alongside bassist Jeff Hill and drummer Tony Mason, the trio crossed the board with infectious blues, hard jazz, and a little bossa nova.

The electric trio started off with what one might expect to hear, minding the name, acid jazz. It was funk, it was raw, and it never shied away from a tight groove.  It would have been acceptable to assume the whole night would be filled with similar tunes, but growing from rapturous harmonies, the set was counterbalanced with cross-genres of jazz. Transitions may not have been placed with the most grace, yet it all seemed so genius.

The song “Chelsea Bridge” followed the funk. Its quiet arrangement was filled with passionate chords and represented Campilongo’s respect as a musician, demonstrating that one doesn’t have to play a bunch of useless, fast notes to be heard.  Refinement is key. This is also the case for “Maceo,” a tune off his upcoming album, Orange. From the venom of jazz, to the slight swing of it all, the trio went directly into the country twang of dixieland. Campilongo proves time and time again that there isn’t anything he can’t attack with style and elite composition.

Orange is set to be released in February 2010. Campilongo is prolonging the release because he doesn’t want to compete with everyone on the planet during the holiday rush. Good news, though, he will have CDs on hand within the next few weeks.

Campilongo doesn’t play every Monday, but often enough. I highly suggest taking a late night trek to the LES to check him out.

by Genette Nowak

ORIGINALITY CORNER
Sunday night in Chicago, some lucky Lollapalooza after-partiers will be the first to hear what happens when Dave Grohl (Foo Fighters), John Paul Jones (Led Zeppelin), and Josh Homme (Queens of the Stone Age) have at it. The group has booked a surprise debut show at the 1,100 capacity Metro, following the close of the three-day festival. My guess is that it will be sheer collective rock genius. But for now there’s only speculation.

Going by the name Them Crooked Vultures, the trio has decided it’s time to stop bullshitting and join forces, but it’s all so ambiguous. For four years, rumors have itched ears that one day this could happen. In 2005, Grohl told Mojo about the prospective project that would feature him on drums, a treat in itself. He hasn’t been dedicated to his kit since the flannel days of Nirvana. The only solid information known is that October 23 is the official release date for the album, Never Deserved The Future, on Interscope.

If you look for them on Myspace there’s nothing more than the logos of each of their respective bands – no music, no pictures, no friends, no comments, nothing. There is a website, but again, a state of nothingness – well, except for a simple silhouette of some sort of being, part human, part vulture.

Public relations are keeping a tight lip. Fans will just have to wait until Monday to catch buzz of The Crooked Vultures with hopes that someone out there will be recording and posting clips on YouTube, or something to that nature. Leave it to these guys to make years-long hearsay come true.

In the two day wait, why not listen to “Go With the Flow,” off the now-classic 2003 Queens of the Stone Age LP Songs For The Deaf, streaming below.

by Genette Nowak

NOT ROCK
Two years have gone by without the pretty pain and masochistic outgivings of Tool. No perfectly starched performances backdropped by bizarre animations of human activity and, worst of all, no new albums. Since the 10,000 Days tour, I have checked in every two months with fingers crossed that Tool’s status quo would change.  Finally, it has.

Tool is headlining Lollapalooza (I can’t believe they are listed second to Depeche Mode).  Though excited to learn they aren’t dead in the water – I was a little worried – there was a bit of shock factor upon learning that their two-year hiatus will come to an end at a frat-boy festival. I never really thought of Tool as the festival-type band, but hey, if Nine Inch Nails can do it – three Grammys or not, their progressive and churning approach to metal, dark and desolate, has always been underappreciated and severely misunderstood – then so too can Tool. It’ll be interesting to see how Snoop Dogg fans receive them.
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“Náttúra” is Björk’s ode to, and plea for, the environment. Respect it and handle with care.

Traditional of Björk’s trip-hop, her recently released single “Náttúra,” Icelandic for nature, was composed specific for a cause - to raise awareness in rally and protest for the ecological issues of Iceland. With an energy crisis and a massive corporate presence closer than the horizon, they face many problems America is in the thick of.

“Náttúra,” released by One Little Indian, is a simple, yet effective, composition of drum, bass, and vocals that encompasses beats Björk began her solo career with in the early 1990s. Tribal rhythms and significant lyrics teach to be humbled by nature and to respect your surroundings. In “Náttúra” Björk is joined on vocals by Thom Yorke of Radiohead.
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